Self Destructive Behaviors

I can do "what's right," resulting in becoming happier, healthier, and enjoying more my life; or take a different path towards feeling lousy, devastating my health, and causing me to bend heavy under the yoke of shame. Two alternatives with obvious, predictable results; which fork shall I choose?

Recently, a political maelstrom engulfed Elliot Spitzer of New York surrounding his decision to allegedly engage the services of prostitutes. This writing is not a treatise about his political savvy (or apparent lack thereof), moral values, or a discussion on why men - or women - stray. However, the whole tawdry event generated within me a launching point: "Knowing that we will be much happier and better off staying true to what's important, why do we time and again opt for self-destructive, harmful decisions?"

Whereby most will never be publicly disgraced for his or her faux pas, each of us periodically engages in unwise, counter-productive activities. In my background, it's exchanging the long-term progress of a healthful lifestyle for the guilt-inducing agony of self-destructive choices.

By way of personal example, for a variety of reasons, Mondays are the most difficult day for me to stay true to my goals, and maintain dietary self-control. I might be meticulous the previous six days, losing four pounds (OK, I'll be honest: one pound), admiring a flatter stomach in the mirror, feeling the joy of life flowing brightly through my soul; and, in an instant, toss it aside, cheat on my diet, and leave a trail of empty snack bar wrappers in my wake.

I know I am not unique. Yet the $64,000 question begging to be asked is, "Why?"

Do we want to see how far we can push limits; toddlers in eye-to-eye stare downs with our parents? Is it because we have hoodwinked ourselves into believing we are exempt from repercussions? I'll scarf down a box of donuts, bucket of peanut butter, and truckload of cookie dough, and convince myself I will appear as a trim young adult half my age - if I simply engage in a ten-minute walk once a month. Huh? What's that about? Denial cuts a deep trough.

Maybe we focus so much on today, we ignore tomorrow. Skipping dessert feels tortuous. Sure, I "know" I'll feel better for the choice; but anything without immediate return is so far into the future, I remain unconvinced it will ever arrive. An immediate order of pleasure beats delivery of good times later.

Change involves sacrifice; one must let go to reach forward. Yet, the definition applied to "sacrifice" makes for startling difference in results. With a shift from "giving up pleasure now" to "gaining what we want long-term," we are more inclined to persevere and hold true the course. Focusing five minutes into the future can help avoid painful mistakes and, ironically, make for a much happier now.