Balancing Act

At a recent convention on regaining a balanced life, in a hall bustling with hundreds of eager attendees, each yearning for the enlightenment of fresh knowledge and 15 more minutes in a day, I hurriedly slid into the empty seat next to a well coifed woman, adorned in an expensive, tailored, professional business suit. Being unbalanced, I was tardy, causing me to miss the opening comments. Desperately wanting to soak up all possible wisdom, I glanced sideways at her notes.

On a bulleted, organized, to do list, she had jotted, "Action Item, High Priority: Put life before work."

Ponder this with me. Isn't writing, "Put life before work" on a to-do list like some sort of endless loop? It's akin to putting up a sticky note that says, "Put up more sticky notes." If you're writing down "Put life before work," and scheduling it like a veterinarian appointment or sales call; to me, it seems like you just might be missing the point.

I am not trying to be catty or judgmental; for in her memo to herself, I saw my reflection, forever organized and alphabetized. The computer alarm flashes on my monitor: "You have an appointment: 2:15 to 2:30. Put life before work." As instructed, for the next quarter hour; I dutifully stare at blue sky; think of my children; call my wife; and read three and half pages in a novel. Should somebody ring me up, I graciously say, "Please call back. Right now, I'm putting life before work."

When the period concludes, another reminder flashes: "You have an appointment: 2:30 through remainder of eternity. Work insanely."

I don't know what strikes me as more unusual; that we attend - and pay for - sessions to instruct us how to regain the natural equilibrium lacking in present-day existence; or that scheduling time for "life" is probably standard operating procedure for many of us. We carry planners, calendars, and PDAs chock-a-block stuffed with engagements that previously slid organically into our lives: "Tuesday 3:15PM Soccer Practice with children;" "Thursday 8:00PM, record TV show to watch later;" "Saturday 9:30PM, date with spouse."

I am not one who yearns wistfully and sadly for "the way things were when we grew up." Not only is that a waste of energy, for we cannot return; but reality is that "innocence" we so fondly recall was not so innocent. We might have had more casual time, and maybe neighbors discussed issues of the day over the back fence. Yet, equally accurate is the fact that racism was accepted as the norm and polio ravaged countless lives. We tend to view the past through nostalgic, and very foggy lenses. Things are not worse now; they are simply "different."

Balance is not ripped from us; rather we surrender it. In spite of this, it waits at any instant, at the ready, set to reappear. Right now, in this moment, stop; give thanks for something; anything; even if it's only that you had these few spare minutes to read and think. As you do, breathe deeply, and then smile sincerely at the next person you see. Don't schedule it for later; you won't get around to it.