Notes From the Other Size

What if you had a disease that not only affected you, but all the people around you? I don't mean something contagious, I mean something that makes you huge, and people around you change without realizing it. They change, and they change you too.

I didn't think about this really until I was fortunately enough to find a solution for a medical weight problem and things went from chronically out of control to shifting back to normal quickly.

Things changed so fast, I really noticed how people react differently to big people, because everyone all of a sudden people got really nice, women say hi, and people chat more.

Makes sense I guess. We live in a world that tells us big people are big because they did it to themselves. So if someone is big, they are defective, not like us. Why can't they just be like us? I bet they have an excuse. I hope they don't talk to me. I don't want to hear it.....

I feel like I am in one of those movies where someone gets transported, and you see a new environment from someone else's eyes. In fact, I was stumbling half asleep in a Casino after a long international trip and for a moment, was startled by my size and stopped, looked again, and said "I didn't dream this did I?"

The first thing I noticed is people chat more, look you in the eye more, and are just more friendly. Women in particular say hi more and make more eye contact. It changed so fast and was so noticable, I guess I forgot what normal was like.

I thought how much of it was me, and looking back, I think size makes us do things to ourselves too. If you work in an "Office Space" cubicle land, you may be around 10 people normal size, and you get used to backing away. "Hey, lets all go skiiing again... Uh, no thanks..."

I've always been outgoing and travel and interact with people a lot. I was over 300 lb sometimes and just ever accepted it, because I knew something made no sense and was very wrong. Rules seemed to apply to everyone but me. People would say "Look at you, DO something," and I would come back "What? Tried that already, and tried harder than you think."

People don't want to accept that. They make up their minds based on appearance only. If you are big, you did it, don't pull out some story. I heard enough already. You are living an argument with people. "I don't know what else to do." "Just get some running shoes."

So when everyone you meet deep down thinks you are a self-deceiving liar, they react differently, or just avoid you. You get tired of it and avoid them too. There is a politics of size that could take a lot of time to study, but no need, I just did a walkthrough and it's remarkable.

Euros look at Americans and the American diet and are appalled, for good reason. They are tougher on big Americans than we are ourselves, but they are tougher on their own big people too. They pull their friends aside faster and say "Hey look, stop it now, you look big."

When I was big, my Euro friends were the ones making polite but urgent comments about it, because they cared, and didn't accept "the story." I was in Europe about a week recently and noticed people are more opinionated about size, and are the worst at dismissing you when you want to explain....

"My thyroid...." "Why is it always you Americans with the syndromes and excuses? Get some running shoes."

I picked up on the changes in strangers more than people I know. I wrote about the changes I experienced and why and most of my friends read it by now, and I'm surprised how many have admitted they thought I really did just listen to them go and get some running shoes.