Tagged as relationships

Are you in a love relationship with a psychopath? Psychopaths are nearly impossible to detect. They appear to be normal, happy, charming, wonderful people who have it together. They do not appear disturbed, callous or devious. They tend to be extremely successful, convincing and in control of their lives. So, unless you are clear on what to look for, you could end up in the worst and most confusingly...
July 7, 2014
We have all heard and probably recited the nursery rhyme "sticks and stones can break my bones..." You know the rest: "But words can never hurt me." If only it were true. The fact is that words do hurt. Unlike a bruise or broken bone, we can't see the wound on the outside. Most of us can recall instances from our own lives when words cut deeply, causing wounds that may still hurt. Since these wounds...
December 8, 2012
Dating brings a rush of emotions to the surface and no matter what has happened in the past, there is usually a sense of anticipation before the date. Could this person be "the one" is the question from the heart. Your experiences in dating, love and commitment are directly related to your past thoughts. What you expect to happen does happen in love. Your purposeful thoughts influence your relationships...
September 17, 2012
As a relationship therapist, I find it interesting that more people don't do premarital counseling. I was thinking that perhaps people are in such a "honeymoon" phase they think to themselves: "We don't need that...we're so in love....etc." This might be true for the moment but what about a few years down the line when the marriage gets thrown a few curve balls? Life has a tendency to do that. I love...
June 29, 2008
I've heard people say, "Why should we bring our personal relationship problems to a therapist? We should be able to figure this out on our own." I can understand this position - especially for people who have attached negative ideas to "therapy" or "counseling." The fact of the matter is, relationship counseling works for those who work at it. I tell couples time and time again, if they both are willing...
May 19, 2008
This is one of the most painful experiences a couple can endure. Here are a few thoughts on the most helpful ways to get through this horrendous ordeal: 1) Cease the affair (this may seem obvious - but sometimes "obvious" is better off stated) 2) The partner who has been unfaithful be willing to apologize as many times as needed - as sincerely as possible as well. They need to take responsibility for...
April 3, 2008
As a couple's therapist, I've seen a myriad of relationships styles. People who come in for counseling are clearly looking to change something they see problematic in their partnership. The problems range from the relatively benign tweaks in communication to serious pain and trust violations due to infidelity and all sorts of issues in between. Filtering through all of this, I've identified ten characteristics...
March 4, 2008
Most simply stated, empathy is the ability to put oneself in another's shoes - and also the willingness to respond to the person's needs. I believe it's one of the most important components of a happy, healthy relationship. Lack of empathy is a very common problem with couples. Many people never learned how to be empathetic from their primary caregivers or weren't modeled empathy by other important...
March 2, 2008
I recently received a post in my "Ask The Singlescoach" section of my website and I wanted to share with you: Dear Singlescoach, I recently got back together with a man I dated for four months and broke up with because of a lack of emotional depth in our conversations. He contacted me later, we discussed the issue, and it was like a light bulb came on for him. After that, we took our communication...
November 8, 2007
Would you like to have a higher EIQ? If so, you can, but it is a process over time that requires your commitment to growth. If you languish in your comfort zone, you won't grow and your EIQ will not grow. If you want to develop your EIQ, do the thing that stretches you rather than the thing that feels safe and comfortable. If you have an opportunity to meet new people, jump all over it. Make yourself...
October 20, 2007