I can always recognize when negativity is weighing on my body, mind and spirit as I feel extremely heavy in all areas. My mind becomes foggy. My disposition becomes depressed and/or agitated, and my spirit feels imbalanced and I become lazy and very sluggish. My view of things becomes quite pessimistic and, although I know the methods in which to purge these toxins, it sometimes takes me a few spilled cups of coffee, or anxiety attacks to call this to my immediate attention. I also know the longer I put things off the more it will snowball and start to permeate out through my life, home and also those I come into contact with.
Negativity, of any kind, doesn't just bog you down and create more stress and havoc in your own life, but it does affect those around you as well and begins to weigh on them. I'd rather be the one purging the toxic person or situation than be the one who is being purged by someone who cannot take the hit of my negativity.
RECOGNIZING YOU'RE FILLED WITH TOXINS
Everyone on this planet is hit with toxins daily. Whether it be a situation which is causing intense stress or aggravation, or psychic vampires who are draining your optimism and positivity by projecting their turmoil onto you. This also includes physical toxins such as pollutants, food allergies, or being in or around unhealthy areas where negativity is sucking the life force out of you. The best way to gauge whether or not it's a passing moment or it's being absorbed into you is how you feel.
- Do you feel agitated, anxious or frenetic?
- Are your thoughts scattered, are you unable to focus, or exhausted?
- Is it difficult to follow through on even menial tasks?
- Is your home or work space cluttered or disorganized?
- Are you feeling physically exhausted and your energy is depleted?
- Are background noises distracting you?
- Does every noise sound loud to you, and/or are you finding yourself unable to hear what others are saying when they are speaking directly to you?
- Is your attention span limited?
- Are you suffering from muscle aches and/or headaches?
If you've answered "yes" to three or more of these questions it's time you purge those toxins. Self care is required, regardless of what is on your plate. If you do not take care of yourself first you will not have the energy and care to assist others or take care of the tasks at hand.
It's important to note, we all have stressful situations during our day and that is understandable and quite normal. However, it becomes a problem when we put our own emotional and physcial needs to the wayside in lieu of taking care of business. Those in power positions at work, or single mothers, all moms, know we tend to disregard our needs for our children and our spouses. We tend to put off doing for ourselves a great deal of the time. And this is where we run into trouble. This is also when those stresses can manifest into health issues and disease.
HOW TO BEGIN THE PROCESS OF PURGING TOXINS
While it's not difficult to purge toxins it can sometimes be difficult to release people who are toxic. Many of us deal with either a toxic co-worker, spouse, or family member. Our friends, though we love and understand their disharmony, can be a huge factor in sucking the oxygen from a room. It's difficult to distance yourself from those you love, even when they are toxic. Our hearts get in the way. Not an easy process, to say the least. But a necessary one if you want to omit toxins from your life. Nothing that is not acknowledged can be fixed. The more your resist the more it persists. It's imperative for you to take a look at the people, places and things which cause you stress.
- Sit with pen in hand and write out all the instances that cause you stress and make you feel weighed down.
- On a separate sheet list those instances and people in order of highest level of stress to lowest.
- Cross off people and situations you can do without. Example: A particular store or person you could avoid and not have to deal with.
- Once you have that list, purge it. If they are situations and/or people you do not have to really have any contact with, do not give it a second thought. Do not frequent that place or talk with that person any longer. No announcement needs to be made. Simply do not entertain this any longer.
- Now look at the list of people and places you actually do have to contend with, such as your place of employment and/or a spouse, family member, or friend. Think long and hard about this but not to the point of causing you more stress. Ask yourself if you've set boundaries with these places and people. Be honest. Have you? Sometimes we tolerate things to be polite or pleasing. That needs to stop. You need not be rude or aggressive. Simply do not tolerate obnoxious behavior, or allow yourself to spend more time than is needed in that place and/or company of that person. Start to set boundaries. Not just with others but yourself. Setting boundaries with self is more difficult because we tend to want to be kind and/or pleasing and we tolerate far more than we should. Start setting boundaries!
- Journal your thoughts on a daily basis. You need not become long winded. Writing even a few lines a day is a great way to purge. Getting your feelings out on paper is cathartic, and even though it doesn't seem like a great feat, it truly is. It's a release and once on paper it's out of you.
- Reflect on what you can do to bring about more positive into your life. Such as joining a yoga class; meditating; taking long walks in a beautiful park. As much as we absorb negative, we do also absorb positive and we must feed our souls with beauty. Refill your body with asthetic places and soothing music. Take that time to have peace in your life.
- Cleanse your body, mind and spirit. If you have the luxury of, perhaps, going to a spa for a relaxing day of massage and mani/pedi, then by all means do so. Or fill your tub and drop in a bath bomb or two. Pamper your skin with essential oils which promote grounding and calm such as Lavender; Chamomille; Frankinsence. The list is endless. Research essential oils which promote more peace and calm. Creative visualization also helps. Start to daydream about the stress-free life you desire and what that looks like. Even if you aren't able to jump on a plane to some exotic paradise you can retreat there in your mind which releases feel good chemicals in the brain which will then begin to relieve cortisol levels (the stress chemical) in the body. Retreating into your "happy place" not only releases much needed feel good chemicals but also inspires you to make those fantasies a reality.
- Sage/Smudge. Purchasing sage and smudging your home and body with this amazing herb clears away negative energy. This is not just folklore, it truly does release negativity in the air.
- Clean and organize your home. It's been said that a cluttered mind results in a cluttered home. And this is true. When we feel more organized and positive it reflects in the home and the more we are organized the less we are surrounded by stress.
- Eat healthy foods and participate in healthy activities. I once had a client who had to sleep with the television on all the time. She couldn't sleep unless it was on. Yet, she never had a nice, relaxing slumber. She woke up feeling more bogged down, as if she hadn't slept at all. Her sleep was not restful. Sleeping with the television on was exhausting her brain. The noise while she slept may have been comforting to her and ease her but the programs playing while she slept were not. We viewed what was playing as she rested and found it was a great amount of either infomercials, haunting her to Buy! Buy! Buy! or tabloid journalism and reality shows that were capitalizing on others' misfortune and pain. It's important to feed your body and mind with healthy foods. Pay attention to the noise around you. This is absorbed not only through your ears but your mind and body as well. In fact, the more time you spend in silence, the more relaxed you will be and you will find answers immediately come to you.
- Learn to say NO! This is the biggest one. And the best way to gauge how you feel about something that is being asked of you is to recognize how you feel when you are asked. If your immediate response is no, and your body feels tight, nervous, or constricted, and your breathing and heart rate starts to quicken, that is your body telling you it does not want to do it, and it's not healthy for you to engage. Saying no brings peace and freedom. There is nothing worse than agreeing to something you do not want to do, as you will feel resentful and also angry. Just say no. It does not require an explanation or excuse.
Taking time for you and separating from those things that bring you grief and stress is how you purge. I know it's not realistic to tell you to purge all those people and places that bring these triggers, but you can set boundaries and not allow this to permeate through you. When faced with these situations and people there are things you can do to shield yourself, and they too are very simple:
- Cleanse with sage before and after.
- Wear or carry a crystal such as flourite, or hematite to keep you grounded and to absorb the negative energy
- Do not engage. If someone is droning on and on about their problems sit silent, let them talk but don't ask more questions. Telling them you understand and sympathize and you wish them well is fine, but remove yourself or change the subject with something positive about their lives. Set boundaries, again. Walk away if need be, excuse yourself, and head to the restroom and run your hands and wrists under cold water and shake it off to release that energy. Breathe and purge it immediately.
- Go with your gut. If you enter a place and immediately feel anxious, do not stay too long. If you must, then hold onto your crystal or continue to breathe. As an empath I feel energy hit me extremely hard, and sometimes I am not able to leave. I shroud myself in lavender (soothing) light and I cover my solar plexus as that is where energy seems to be drawn in by the body. Your body has a natural reflex when you are uncomfortable. We instinctively cross our arms and cover that area. Many feel that is a signal that we are closed minded and closed off to things, that is not necessarily the case. Your body has a natural reaction and will immediately try to protect itself. Hence the reason you cross your arms over your solar plexus.
- Forgive yourself for not giving away too much of your energy or power. Do not make the mistake of thinking you are not a compassionate caring person. You are. But you cannot afford to carry the weight of these toxins. If you recognize that chronic absorbtion of the negative can result in severe health problems and disease, you may realize it's best you start to forgive yourself for not allowing these toxins to enter.
I understand there are so many factors and reasons why we cannot just purge all the negative in our lives. We cannot necessarily leave our jobs tomorrow to promote peace in our spirits. We shouldn't just leave a spouse because of some marital stress agents. We don't walk away from family and friends because they, too, are having a rough patch. And I will address what to do in these situations in other posts. This article is to give you a blueprint to how to start the shift and to take some small initiatives in this moment until the bigger ones can be later addressed.
Wishing you all a blessed and and prosperous week.