by Dawn Michael
This is a topic that many people want to know about but are too shy to ask.
Does anal sex hurt?
As a sexologist, sexual educator along with being a marriage counselor, I have been privately asked this question many times and if people are asking than many people that are shy are not and this is one topic that should be explained properly. It does not make a difference if you are a male or female, if the anus is not properly lubricated and the penis is not gently inserted then anal sex will hurt like heck. The fact is that if a person is engaging in anal sex it is done because they want to do it otherwise dont do it! The tissue around the anus is very sensitive and if the muscle is tight it can easily tear causing a fissure which is very painful. Having anal sex when it is not wanted can not only be damaging to the body but to the mind. Anal sex should be enjoyed and enjoyable and if it is not then do not do it.
The proper way to engage in anal sex is to make sure that you are using a good lubrication and there are many wonderful products made just for anal sex. The next step is to go slow, slow and slower, the muscle around the anus needs to be relaxed and ready. One way to start the process is to use a desensitize gel and the next could be to insert an anal probe that increases in size until the muscle surrounding the area loosens up, they have anal kits that are for beginners for this. One other option is to lubricate and very slowly inset the penis tip. Once the muscle is loose the anus will open up like a flower and can be properly penetrated. Make sure to use a condom, because sexually transmitted diseases can still be passed through the anus and for women especially do not have vagina sex until after the penis is properly cleaned. A woman can get a very bad urinary tract infection if this happens.
For a man he can have his prostrated stimulated with anal sex and this can be very enjoyable and is known as the male g-spot. For a woman if anal sex is done the right way for some women it can be enjoyable as well. The point is for a man who enjoys giving anal sex and wants to have it with his girl friend; wife or partner is to be patient. The whole point is for the person who is being penetrated to trust that their partner will stop when asked to and they will be gentle, if that trust is broken than anal sex can become a very unpleasant experience as opposed to a pleasant experience.
I am Certified Clinical Sexologist and Relationship Coach, helping couples to enjoy a healthy sex life. I am a sexual healer, counselor and coach. I offer couples counseling as well as individual counseling. For more information visit my website "The Happy Spouse".
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