Cubicle Chronicles
I'm That Guy
"I'm 'That Guy'..."
Friday, December 11, 2009
2:05pm
I’m going to keep today’s post short and sweet. It’s Friday, and I’m sure none of you feel like doing anything today. I sure don’t. Plus, it was our office holiday potluck today at lunch. I think most of us around the office are currently suffering from a case of Stage 3 Food Coma (yeah, pretty serious situation). I actually just dozed off for a second while typing that last sentence.
At any rate, I wanted to share my horrifying experience at this year’s potluck. This year, I was “that guy.” Some of you may be asking, “Dewey, what does that mean? What do you mean you were ‘that guy’?” Let me tell you.
So every year, there is that one person that brings that one really smelly dish to the holiday potluck. You know the type I’m talking about. It stinks up the refrigerator, the oven, the microwave, the kitchen, the entire office, and even everybody’s breath after they eat it. Every year, I make it a point to not be “that guy”. I even make fun of “that guy” every year. And I definitely steer clear of the dish that “that guy” brings (I like to keep my breath as fresh as possible).
But this year, I was accidentally “that guy.” I decided to make my world renowned Crab Stuffed Mushrooms. Now, I must admit that I usually use imitation crab (it’s cheaper, provides good flavor, and now I know that it doesn’t have the same pungent aroma that real crab has). But this year I decided to kick it up a notch and go for the real thing. Little did I know that it would be the biggest mistake I could ever make, because in turn, I became “that guy” with the smelly dish. It smelled up the office fridge, then the oven when I reheated them, then the kitchen was stinky. By the time everyone ate them, the office wreaked (and still kind of does) and everyone definitely had (or still has) it on their breath.
One word…FAILURE! I was “that guy.”
Have a great weekend and make sure you aren’t “that guy” (or gal) at your holiday potluck this year.
What?! No Coffee?
"What?! No Coffee?"
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
11:01am
Let me start this morning’s post by saying that I am very angry. Not just angry, but irritable, tired, cranky, grumpy, and every other mood you can name in the category of being generally mad at the world. And this is all because I have given up coffee. Okay, okay…so I can’t say that I have given up completely. Today is only the second day without my morning “cuppa joe”. But let me tell you, it is painful.
So, this all started on Monday when I had my first health/wellness coaching session with the sponsors of the Workplace Wellness Channel here on Wellness.com (if you need a refresher on my relationship with them, see my first post, “Hello World”). While many of the details of the conversation will be kept private (you all don’t really need to know how out of shape and unhealthy I am), I will touch on our conversation about coffee because it has the potential to be life-changing for me.
During my conversation with the health coach, while I was taking a sip of my mocha latte, almost as if on cue, he asks me, “So how do you take your morning cup of coffee?” I paused for a second, almost choking on my chocolaty, velvety sip. We then began to discuss the health implications of my daily habit.
We got online and looked up the nutrition facts for my drink and I was astounded. Now, I normally get a 20 oz. mocha latte every day, but I am going to list the nutrition facts for the 16 oz., since that is probably the size that the majority of you get. In a 16 oz. mocha latte at my favorite coffee shop, there are 380 Calories, 4.5 grams of Saturated Fat, 500 mg of Sodium, and 67 grams of Carbohydrates. I was then told that this 16 oz. beverage gives me nearly a quarter of my daily values for the given categories listed. And the 20 oz. that I usually get is giving me well over one quarter of my daily values.
I really couldn’t believe it. I never would have guessed that a delicious cup of coffee could have that level of Calories, Sodium, and Carbohydrates. We then talked about the amount of money that I spent over the course of a year getting that cup of coffee every day. We rounded up to $5 per day when you take into account tipping the barista, and I will let you do the math on what that multiplies out to. The health coach made a good point when he said, “Now imagine if you spent that money on improving your health. You would be healthier, feel better, and you wouldn’t feel the need for that morning cup of coffee anymore.”
It made a lot of sense. So much sense that here I am on day 2 with no coffee. I figure that I will take it one day at a time. Let’s see how long I can last.
P.S. – Just visit the website for your favorite coffee shop to see the nutrition facts for your drink of choice.
P.P.S. – Feel free to leave a comment or ask questions. I will try to write back or touch on the subject in my regular posts.
Hello World
"Hello World"
Thursday, December 3, 2009
3:16pm
So here I am, trying to kill some time here at the end of the workday. Tomorrow is Friday, which would normally be cause for some sort of celebration or excitement since the weekend is almost upon us. Ha, not this week. You see, when you are paid on salary (and a paltry one at that), and half of the department has been cut in the last 9 months, it makes for plenty of extra work that yours truly has the privilege of trying to complete (emphasis on the trying). And naturally, since I cannot possibly complete the work of three people in a normal work week, I will be here on Saturday...in my tiny cubicle...by myself...trying in vain to get caught up. So why am I wasting my time writing this right now? That's a good question. I guess I should have introduced myself...
The name is Dewey and I am an account executive with a technology firm in sunny San Diego (since nobody in my company knows I am doing this, I would rather not be any more specific). I was approached recently by the sponsors of this Workplace Wellness Channel to contribute a regular blog post on Wellness.com. When they first asked me, I literally laughed in their face. You should see me, I am definitely not the picture of health (the flattering cartoon image is not far off). But I guess I am exactly what they were looking for. In exchange for my riveting insight on the cubicle lifestyle, they are going to help me improve my health and wellness (no small feat, let me tell you; should make my wife happy though). So, this should be quite interesting.
Check back periodically to see what I am up to. I will try to share many of the things I learn on my “path to wellness” as they say. I'll let you know what works for me and what doesn't, what I like and what I despise, and along the way I will share some of the sad (and often gut-busting) stories that can only come out of an office filled with cubicles and the cubicle-rats that occupy them.
I smell food, gotta go! Until next time...
P.S. - Follow me on Twitter for more insight into my exciting life @deweydoeswell.
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